Saturday, May 28, 2005
Big Brains in the British Medical Community
The solution to this epidemic of death by cutlery... "We suggest that banning the sale of long pointed knives is a sensible and practical measure..."
I'm no expert on the dynamics of the thought processes of the criminal mind but I have grave concerns for our future if this is the best that the brightest among us have to offer.
My suggestion to the authors of the above referenced study: Knives don't kill people. People with murderous intent and access to knives, guns, baseball bats, heavy chains, various and sundry poisons, heavy sculptures, automobiles, garrots, high balconies, any manner of power tools and flammable accelerants kill people.
My list is not exhaustive and I invite the reader to contribute to other modes of destruction (all of which apparently require some sort of federal ban).
Thursday, May 26, 2005
"the showing of covered male genitals in a discernibly turgid state."
I'm particularly gratified to note the precise exposition of this important bit of legislation. However, several questions arise:
- What degree of scrutiny would be required to define the requisite "discernibly turgid state"? Would a casual glance be the standard or would the effort required for deliberate, concentrated examination be acceptable?
- Shouldn't there be some provisions for mitigating circumstances such as instigation by a voluptuous, scantily clad vixen showing up at an all boys' parochial school picnic outing?
- What kind of proof would be required? It would seem that the evidence would be evanescent at best particularly after the suspected perpetrator was notified that he's to be arrested.
I'd be grateful for some legal clarification as a confluence of events might find me in one of the states in question in the state in question.
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
One Big Cake
I'm anticipating a lot of doggie bags.
Monday, May 16, 2005
Logical Flaw in Newsweek's "Koran Down the Toilet" Story
Personally, I never trusted Newsweek's story about the Guantanamo Bay intelligence agent who flushed a copy of the Koran down a toilet. I don't know how things are at your house but around here, any such attempt would require a prompt search for the plumber's helper.
Saturday, May 14, 2005
Someone's in a lot of trouble!
Friday, May 13, 2005
Huffington's Post vs. Huffington's Toast
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Michael Heistand's take on the impact of the NHL player's strike
His article quotes NHL spokeswoman Bernadette Mansur as saying "the point is not about the ratings."
Heistand then makes the exceptionally apropos observation that "When leagues or networks say ratings are not really the point, they're usually talking about unflattering ratings." That's how journalism is done.
Monday, May 09, 2005
I particularly liked this example of how he made the model's breasts larger and her hips slimmer. One can only imagine the wider applications.
Conspicuous absences at the Time Traveler Convention
Six reasons for this conspicuous absence were raised. To me, there was a seventh: Perhaps in the future, time traveler conventions are generally dismissed as passé.
Saturday, May 07, 2005
Disturbing developments in Mount Kisco, NY
According to the U.S. Bureau of Engraving and Printing, a quarter weighs 5.7 grams. It therefore follows that $30,000 weighs about 1,508 pounds. A little research reveals that Mount Kisco is a rather small town (according to the very informative Mount Kisco Chamber of Commerce website). It doesn't reflect well on a municipality when, though with a population of less than 10,000, they can't keep track of three quarters of a ton of parking meter revenue.
In fairness to those in charge, this crime was apparently uncovered as a result of changes to meter collecting procedures. These were obviously overdue.
There's one other point I'd like to make. I've never held myself out as an expert on parking meter revenues but if $30,000 was not enough of a percentage of all such revenue to be easily noticed, I'd submit that Mount Kisco residents are being exploited for their parking dollars.
By the way. I know most of you are wondering: how much would that $30,000 worth of currency weigh if it were in pennies? Always your faithful servant, I calculate that at 2.5 grams per penny, that would be 16,535 pounds.
Friday, May 06, 2005
British Islam Coming of Age
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Lynndie England's Position in the U.S. Military
Either way, I hope she exhibits a higher level of competence when she commissions the ghost writer for her inevitable book. If I may suggest a title: I've got you under my shin, a love story.
Monday, May 02, 2005
More on NASA's commitment to flight shuttle safety
When someone criticizes an organization, one needs to assess three things:
- Do the claims make sense?
- Is the critic credible?
- Does the critic have a hidden agenda?
Sunday, May 01, 2005
U.S./N. Korean Relations and the Language of Diplomacy
It seems quite likely that North Korea has tested a short range missle by firing one into the Sea of Japan. What then will the linguists make of the following words exchanged by representatives of President Bush and leader Kim Jong Il?
White House chief of staff Andrew H. Card Jr: The North Koreans are "bullies" and President Il is "not a nice person."
North Korean spokesmen: President Bush is "a hooligan" and a "philistine".
Words that hurt.
Mapplethorpe Controversy Relived
By the way, one point I've learned from this story is the accepted journalistic term for the male genitalia (thankfully a topic not often seen in the lay press).